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 Home  Top-Ten List for Attracting Your Life Partner  Clearing Damaging Relationships from the Past
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By Wendy Lapidus-Saltz,
CH One of the strongest ways to not-find a partner in life and love is to let sad memories, limiting "rules," and feelings of inadequacy from past relationships stop you. How do you move on to aliveness and optimism about what is in front of you? Clear the past. For many people, a real-life conversation with a person who has caused hurt is a mistake. That person, who has had a hold on you before, could do the same again, leading you back down that painful path. If you feel this may be true for you, the safer way is to use the following method. It requires that you begin by inducing a hypnotic state in yourself. You can learn self-hypnosis from any qualified, certified hypnotherapist in private practice, from a community course, or from a book found in a bookstore or library. There are also inexpensive self-hypnosis tapes available at bookstores, health-food stores, and massage stores. Once hypnosis is induced, follow this process: (PRINT THIS OUT and read it completely before beginning the process. Use it for reference as you begin the process.) Use any effective self-hypnosis method to put yourself into hypnosis. Picture the person who has hurt you in a relationship. It may have been a romantic relationship, an important friendship, or it may be a family member. Be clear that your objective is to forgive and to release this memory to make room for the loving, fulfilling relationship(s) you want to have in your life. Invite the person into your mind's eye, and take a moment to see, feel, and be aware of his/her presence. Notice the emotions that come up and allow them to just be there. Talk to the person and simply tell him that your relationship with him in the past has been hurtful to you and that you are now clearing away the anger and hurt, restoring what was damaged in you, and releasing the anger and pain you've held toward him. That you are forgiving him as much as you can. You may find, as you say this to the person and look at him, you get fresh insights about how vulnerable and damaged he himself actually is, how he is not a powerful person at all, but just someone trying to make his own way through life, making bad choices along the way. Or you may not. Either way, allow yourself to come as close as you can to forgiving him. Strip him of the negative power he has had over you. Then say something like, "I forgive you and I release you. Go on your way and be happy." And make the release. When you feel you have released him,allow him to disappear, and do the same process with the next person . . . until you have cleared away, as best you can, all residual hurt, pain, anger and upset. You can repeat the process if you feel the need to, or if you find other people in your past that you need to release. Take a moment, and allow yourself to sense what has taken the place of those negative feelings: a new lightness and openness that is now yours. You may feel this almost physically. Tell yourself that you can now seek your life partner more effectively--because more love and more of your Self are available to you. Bring yourself out of hypnosis. Make use of the gift you have just given yourself. And smile. Kudos
to the world-renowned Shakti Gawain for originating a procedure to clear
old wounds through visualization. The above owes a debt to her teachings.
©
2004 by Wendy-Lapidus-Saltz. Hypno-Attraction® is a registered trademark
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